If There Are Noises

Things are piling up; hours are slowly passing, slipping into the nothingness that is the past. There are few things I find comfort in, such as music and friends I never talk to; writing letters, blog posts, and stories keep my facade from breaking, and spilling forth a torrent of emotions. This is all truth. I swear by it.
Just thinking about school brings forth painful pangs and distress. I don't know why this is so; that is where I truly wish I was lying. One should never want to lie. I am a firm believer in truth, whether is brings about the best results is up for debate.
I also firmly believe in "everything happens for a reason." Whether or not you acknowledge it, things you do will always affect your future; your past dictates your future. This reminds of a rather ingenious and veracious quote "he who controls the past controls the future, he who controls the future controls the past." That quote should be something similar in the text of 1984, by George Orwell. Arguably one of the greatest writers of all time, he is on a pantheon that few are placed upon. Well for me, there are very few authors but here they are: George Orwell, William Faulkner, J.D. Salinger, Jeffery Eugenides, John Steinbeck, and Kurt Vonnegut. All of the aforementioned are my favorite authors for several reasons. I extol them, and wish so badly to achieve they greatness they have earned.
But one step at a time is all I have to say to myself.
Taking AP Language has a reason, I do not know that reason as of yet, but soon I will. Only time will tell what I regret.
The days are getting longer, slowly but surely they are. I cannot accurately judge by the weather living where I live; it is too sporadic to judge from temperature and sunshine.
Spring is slowly enveloping the landscape. It's wrought with sweet scents and a feeling of renewal, with new growths and a closing school year.
Soon everything will be over. And I can act in movies, and dream without fear, and have time for things that I love to do.
This is one crazy post, it's a mix of ranting and monloguing...
These are my thoughts, and if you do not care for them, that's perfectly alright with me.
I just needed to clear my head. Find meaning in all the buzzing, find serenity in a rather hectic mind.
This could turn into a rather existentialist blog post, trying to find meaning in a rather meaningless world, or time I should say. It seems as though that is my generations zeitgeist, finding some sort of meaning in a rather hollow world. We are trying to try and reconnect with our roots, our past. Much like the Lost Generation, except minus Paris and Hemingway, please. The hour is of late, and I should study up on chromosomal packaging and trigonometric functions.